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LETTER -- 1999A

Sometimes children think of themselves before taking the time to realize what their parents do for them. I never understood my parents -- and they never understood me -- because we FAILED TO COMMUNICATE. It's a shame that, in the act of growing up into adults, children fail to see the value of the adults of their life. Had I taken the time to get to really know my father, we would not now be so at odds with each other. Both of us have become stuck in our ways...(I'm 40...he's in his 60s.)
Your daughter needs to carefully consider what she is saying in her heart. Words that leave our mouths can never return.
Once spoken, the consequences of angry thoughts can never be undone.
Your husband too needs to be careful in how he speaks. Though I'm sure he is a very intelligent person, sometimes the most intelligent people know when to stand and fight, and when to walk away. Intelligence, however, is not the source of our strengths as Christians; Jesus is that strength, and if we do not take time to consider WWJD (What Would Jesus Do?) then we are cheating ourselves of so much, and we are doing The Lord a dis-service.
Remember, The Bible, God's own Word -- in the beginning was The Word, and The Word was with God, and THE WORD WAS GOD -- tell us that we are to speak only that which is edifying to Him.
If we do not take the time to consider Him in all situations, we are lost; not in the sense of no longer being saved -- for once saved, always saved -- but lost in that we allow moments to slip by that contain the stupidity of anger and which, by the very flesh that helped spawn such non-Christian attitudes and behaviors, will certainly come back again to be used by the deceiver against those who are saved.
Short version: satan loves it when people argue. He doesn't care that we who are saved do not bow to the Lord of the flesh, but that we are, no matter the length of time involved, not focused on Him who is greater (greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world.)
Your daughter needs to understand that, though a Christian, you and your husband are still imperfect. You both, also, need to remember the same about your daughter. (God, who called us to our faith, will one day confirm and perfect us.)
If we allow anger to dictate the actions we take with one another, what manner of Jesus-like example are we? If we give strength to the deceiver, then we take away from the potential of the Victor in our lives.
The Lord will one day greet us, individually and at length, and ask us to make an account of all we do, think, say, and are in this world.
Ironically, I caught a great Truth of The Lord through a secular movie (The Matrix): "Sooner or later you're going to realize... there's a difference between knowing the path, and walking the path." A Christian who goes to church, reads the Bible, pray, and asks for repentance is a Christian who knows the path. A Chrstian who makes mistakes, but who tries to learn from them and who asks for forgiveness for them, is one who is WALKING THE PATH.
In the end, even the smallest of actions will effect the day-to-day existence of every Christian: you can not serve two masters...and anger is not of the faithful Master who gave his only begotten Son to bring us back into the fold of The Lord.
Trust in The Lord with all your heart and soul, and you'll grow in the knowing of The Lord, which will in turn allow you to better walk in the path The Lord has laid out before you, brought you to the very edge of, and is willing, daily, minute-by-minute, to walk you through Himself, even (as the poem Footprints explains) if it means He has to carry you on His more than capable shoulders. Our problem, as Christians, is that we are often so busy thinking of ourselves, we fail even to realize when He is carrying us.
Anyway, I hope this has helped your husband and daughter situation in some way.
Gotta go for now. Take care and God Bless†
† † † † † † † † † † † † † † † † † † † † † † † † † Your Servant in Jesus Christ,

Andrew D. Festa
Jesus is Lord Forever (Christian Page):
Church where I'm a member.
"The Lord Bless you, and keep you; The Lord make His Face shine on you, and be Gracious to you; The Lord lift up His countenance on you, and give you Peace." (Numbers 6:24-26)

This letter was written for someone I met on the internet through a Christian Writers Group who was having a bit of a family situation.
It is here now in the hopes that it will somehow benefit others who might be going through the same thing.